From NPAWorldwide by Veronica Scrimshaw
Great Dialogue in our business is the cornerstone of our craft. And great dialogue has four distinct elements; Probing, Listening, Responding, and Alignment.
These four elements are like the chambers of the heart; each section or chamber is a unique and critical part of the communication process with both clients and candidates.
Listening is considered a soft skill, which is ironic considering that it is one of the hardest things you will ever do. If you don’t believe me, ask your significant other. Our purpose is to better understand active listening as an integral part of what is really behind the heart of great dialogue and why great communication drives great recruiting.
If I were to invite you to a two-day listening seminar, most of you would opt for a slow, painful death. Let’s face it, the skill of listening does not always get good press. It’s not one of the more exciting aspects of our jobs. However, nothing is gained by probing and qualifying unless we have first learned how to listen effectively. You see, the best interviewers aren’t smooth talkers: they are smooth listeners. Think about it. How much can you learn from what you are saying? Not much. You already know it, so by speaking, you’re repeating yourself. But everything the candidate says is potentially valuable.
The good news is that we can train ourselves to be good listeners. (Just ask any mother if she can discern her baby’s cry from others in a crowded nursery.) You can learn to tune in the important and tune out the extraneous. Think of how it feels when someone’s not listening to you. You feel ignored, unimportant. Instead of liking the other person, you think he or she is rude or self-interested. Conversely, people who feel they are being heard are easier to hire.
Six Tips To Become An Active Listener
By: Rob Mosley of Next Level Exchange
1. Listen without deciding.
Be like a polltaker asking questions impartially simply to get the information. Neither agree nor disagree. Show understanding by nodding or saying, “I see” or “I get it.” A response of, “I know just how you feel” may seem empathetic but may also elicit an angry, “How could you possible know how I feel?”
2. Use a neutral tone of voice.
Not monotone or robotic, but casual, light, free from heavy emotional baggage. The same tone of voice you would use to ask, “Is it raining?” You are not judging the rain; you just want to know whether an umbrella is called for.
3. Avoid listening autobiographically.
“Something just like that happened to me” ends the listening and sends the message that you want to tell your story instead.
4. Reframe to show understanding and to clarify.
“So what you’re saying is . . .” “I think I just heard you say . . .is that right?” There are many techniques that you can use.
5. Go through the doors that they open.
The listener actually guides the conversation by choosing the next subject to ask about. For example, let’s say you are listening to the hiring manager who has the following complaint: “Rob is always late with completing reference checks on candidates that I need at the end of our candidate’s interview process. He says it is because people in the office are constantly interrupting him.”
Example Listening Skills
Door 1: Rob. It sounds as though there might be an inefficient pattern here. What do you think could be done to help Rob?
Door 2: The client interview process. Why is it that Rob has to wait until the end of the interview process to take a first round of reference checks?
Door 3: Reference checks delegation. Is there someone in addition to Rob that might be able to assist in getting the reference checks completed in a timely fashion?
Door 4: The interruptions. It sounds as though Rob’s work area is very busy. What could be done to reduce his interruptions? There is also the universal door of the emotions the speaker is experiencing. “You sound really upset. What do you think could be done so you won’t feel that way anymore?”
6. Get closure.
Stay until the end of the conversation. If you begin to listen and then don’t let the candidate finish everything they want to say, you frustrate them and lose their trust.
Too many interviewers are ‘hearing,’ not listening. Active listening is a very specific set of techniques that do not just happen automatically. You must learn, train and practice at least some techniques to achieve competency in active interviewing. It will change the quality of your new hires and increase the number of candidates that will want to work for you.